Wednesday, February 24, 2010

loving lover loves

owh pening bace title..
i just read this from one of my fren's page
it's just nice
so i decided to put it here
it's from somebody's email

My husband is S/W Engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders.
Two years of courtship and now, five years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness.


I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband is my complete opposite; his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about LOVE.


One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.



"Why?" he asked, shocked.


"I am tired. There are no reasons for everything in the world!" I answered.


He kept silent the whole night, seemingly in deep thought. My feeling of disappointment only increased. Here was a man who was not able to even express his predicament, so what else could I expect from him?


And finally he asked me: "What can I do to change your mind?"


Somebody said it right... It's hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.


Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered: "Here is the question. If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind.


Let's say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?"


He said: "I will give you your answer tomorrow...." My hopes just sank by listening to his response.


I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes....


My dear, "I would not pick that flower for you, but....please allow me to explain the reasons further.....


This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading.


"When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen. I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.


You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.


You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city. I have to save my eyes to show you the way.


You always have the cramps whenever your "good friend" approaches every month. I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy.


You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.


You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails and help to remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand...and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the colour of the glow on your young face...


Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet, and die ... "


My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting... and as I continue on reading... "Now, that you have finished reading my answer, and if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk...


I rushed to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread....Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone... 

isn't that just sweet???
owh it's really sweet
although i dont believe in LOVE i believe in FATE.
org ckp terima psgn seadanya..
bersyukur atas ape yang ade..
ni lah contohnye..
nak ckp lebih pun pengalaman takde maaa

but i got my lovelife
i got my momndad
my brothernsisters
the whole bunch of what we called family
then i'm glad that i passed the exams (Alhamdulillah)
n hope that i do pass them next next time (InsyaAllah)

last but not least i hope that i'll have someone by my side
at that moment maybe i'll change so that
i believe in LOVE and FATE

till then
xoxo

Sunday, February 21, 2010

i love daddy

i love it
when he thinks how upset his children might be
then said 'ngaju ke?'


i love it 
when he still carries the luggage even if i insist
then said 'malu la anak dara pikul beg'


i love it 
when he spent and hide it from mum
then said 'murah cikai je nih' before mum blabbering


i love it 
when he's being cool when i'm not
then he said 'it's okay'


i love it
when he listed every single person in  the house that made me cry
at last he said 'mama yang buat ke?'


i love it 
when i got nothing for my birthday
but i got many many things the other someday


i love it
when he picked up my call in meeting room
and then replied 'abah tgh meeting tapi takpe.ade ape?'


i love it 
when he laughed all the way when his secrets were out
then said 'nak bodek abah tp tak pandai smpn rhsia'

i love it 
when i love everything about my daddy
xoxo

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

kenapa malas..?

aduhai...
exam luse da..
tapi satu pun tak cover lagik for that subject
i really dont get it why n whats wrong with me
knp sangat malas ni....

btw now i feel that i did sumthing wrong
n i'm thinking ways to fix it
ways to approach n respond
hehe

ohh really i need to study
i nak study grant..
sungguh exam fees for the papers are expensive
so i must should have the grant

it's raining now n this is the perfect  time to miss home
teringat zaman mule2 masuk boarding school
always menghitung hari detik demi detik
fikir bile nak abis sekolah walhal baru first week masuk form 1
heh got 5 years time to go
wut a long journey
however
last day at school i always thought that time is running so fast
sekejap je rs setahun skrg..

n lagik sekejap je rs sehari skrg due to condition that i'm having my exams the day after tomorrow
so i'll stop right here untuk bagi laluan pada diri sendiri pg berehat
dan kemudian sambung belajar
n really, i need to fix my sleeping cycle
it's turning upside down nowadays

till meet again
xoxo

Monday, February 15, 2010

i'm a loner

hai!
tonite i nak share this one song that i keep playing bile i masuk kete put
hahahaha
skit2 nak lagu no 57 (put pn redha jerk)
cn blue nyanyi
i suke bangat sbb ahli grupnye pun kacak sangat!
hahahah
lagu ni catchy but actually is a sad one (heh)
dlm my playlist lagu no 2
enjoy!!


(I'm a loner. I'm a loner.
I'm a loner. I'm a loner.)

Look, look at me, me. Look at me straight in the eyes.
Look, you are already look at elsewhere.
Check it one two three, you only keep looking at the clock.
You don't have to tell me. I know you got someone else.


(Rap)
You've been meeting someone else often lately.
You don't even call me first anymore.
When you are with me, you would only look at the sky even if a day is a second long.
Oh~ I know your mind. The distance between you and I.
Getting farther and wider. We are no better than strangers.


 oh baby

 I'm a loner, I'm a loner. daridiridara du~ 
I'm a loner. I'm a loner. daridiridara du~
I'm a loner, I'm a loner. I'm a loner being sad at love,

 shedding tear at love. 
sad sad sad sad sad sad sad tonight. 
My hurt hurts.
Oh no no no no no body knows, 

how I feel.
one two three four five six seven night, 

I'm cheering up myself passing many nights awake.

(Rap) If you had just told me honestly
that you got someone else. That you hate me.
Then I wouldn't have hated you to death.
check it one two three. Remembering your words, they are all silly lies.

Love is going. Love is leaving.
(One person and one love. Everything that I've been used to)
I should erase you after tonight.
(Yes, I should force myself to erase you. I should do so since you abandoned me)
(Gone Gone my love is gone)


I'm a loner, I'm a loner. daridiridara du~ 

I'm a loner, I'm a loner. daridiridara du~
I'm a loner, I'm a loner. I'm a loner hurt by love and waiting for love.
sad sad sad sad sad sad sad tonight, I want this to be a dream.
Oh no no no no no body knows, no body knows me.
one two three four five six seven night, I'm crying passing many nights awake.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

LUPA

sungguh aku lupa perasaan itu
puas aku korek kotak fikiran tapi still tak jumpa
tak mengapalah
lupa pada hal yang satu nih cukup bagus bagi aku


tapi sumpah takut bile kite jadi seorang yang pelupa
lupa ttp iron, lupa tutup lampu kereta etc
mahu menangis gelabah tahap cipan
waktu ni la segala jenis drama tragis duk play dalam bayangan aku
takut tu kalau jadi mcm dalam crite 'a moment to remember'
YA ALLAH sihatkan lah tubuh badan dan fikiran ku


tambah plak kalau tetiba terhantuk kepala kat dinding
dengan daya yang agak kuat smpi blk sblah pun dgr
mahu tak gelabah duk fikir 'aku  kene pg CT SCAN ker??'
mula la msg kwn2 kedoktoran mntk pndgn n nasihat
ALHAMDULILLAH, stakat nih takde ape2 yang buruk


kesimpulannya, kite tahu nikmat akal fikiran yang ALLAH bagi ni amat berharga
lagik berharga thp infiniti dari kereta BMW 6 series yang aku idamkan
oleh itu mmgla waktu emo bercinta bagai nak gila dulu mntak nak lupa ingatan
tapi skrg dah rasional jadik lebih waras untuk pilih supaya mnjaga kesihatan otak,akal,fikiran dan kenangan
and oleh sbb human is the best creature in the world, we can choose to just leave those yang memang menyakitkan hati dan tak layak untuk diingat
yes!saya sekarang lebih matured (^-^)


plus, i've already treasured my sweetest moments with my frens-dunia-akhirat during our first BBQ together which was located at taman tasik seksyen 7 last weekend...
but sorry i'm not uploading the pictures as i dont have the copy yet
so just drop by here --> http://fizanyasin.blogspot.com to view some of them


till meet again
xoxo

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

kesedaran

entah knp hati terpanggil untuk singgah di laman coretan seorg shbt yg pernah saya knal dahulu
kala membaca blognya hati terusik sekali
i'm totally impressed!


tatkala saya menitip setiap patah perkataan yang ditulisnya
semuanya bermakna
tiada satu pun yang kosong


oh sungguh saya sedar
banyak masa yang dah dilengahkan
banyak peluang yang dah dibazirkan
banyak nikmat yang disiakan


dan sungguh saya fikir
saya memang tidak sempurna
pada pandangan semua orang
apatah lagi pada pandangan DIA


saya kemudian termenung
bertafakur apakah saya berusaha
berusaha untuk mengubah sesuatu
supaya hari esok lebih bererti dari hari ini


dan sesungguhnya kealpaan itu masih disisi
saya cemburu dengan dia
banyak kesedaran yang dia perolehi
sungguh itu nikmat yang manis


dalam hati 


YA ALLAH, peliharalah nikmat ISLAM dan IMAN dalam diri hamba-MU
hanya pada ENGKAUlah hambamu ini memohon rahmat-MU

Sunday, February 7, 2010

HATI

waaaaaaaaaaaaaa...serabut serabut serabut


hurm..hm...mmm....


knp hati saye kecik...


knp air mata da takde..


the only thing that i need now is tears


please..please..please...






and momdad please i wanna have that BB (T-T)

Thursday, February 4, 2010

littlest thing

lame gile tak tulis kat sini
banyak nak crite tapi tunggu dulu
sbb kite nak kmpul material seeloknye =P


papepun nak bgtahu klas amat penat wo..
selalu klu balik klas cmpk je beg sekolah tu kat tepi..
bawak pegi n balik klas je
bile ade exam baru selongkar cari barang ilmiah
tapi sem nih jadi lainnnnn....


tambah2 plak cuaca tak menentu buatkan demam
tapi da okey pun


nnt update lagik
daaaaaa...